Saturday, November 13, 2004

A long overdue return to 1950s values

Today, I rejoice in the knowledge that the state I live in, the wonderfully progressive Lone Star State, has taken initiative to improve the sex education programs across the state. The Texas Board of Education has approved a new set of textbooks that emphasize abstinence and reduce discussions of contraception to a bare minimum. Would that they could have left it out altogether. Knowledge of contraception is no doubt the number one reason Texas has the highest teenage pregnancy rate in America.

The Board also insisted that the textbooks define marriage as "a lifelong union between a man and a woman." With any luck, this definition will have two effects: first, it will convince students that homosexuality is a foolish choice (because it is a choice, you know); and second, by emphasizing the lifelong-ness of the union, will help lower Texas's divorce rate, which is one of the highest in the country.

Unfortunately, the textbooks maintain references to sexually transmitted diseases, which should never be an issue since no one engages in sexual activity until marriage, and then only in the missionary position. However, at least they got the facts right this time, citing "getting plenty of rest" among other methods as the best ways to avoid those awful STDs.

I personally would like to thank the Texas Board of Education for taking such strides toward returning our nation to 1950s values. I think it's super swell, and encourage other states to follow suit.

As a final note, defines sarcasm as "a cutting, often ironic remark intended to wound; a form of wit that is marked by the use of sarcastic language and is intended to make its victim the butt of contempt or ridicule."

Or, to put it more simply, Tuck Fexas.

Song lyric of the day:
"Well maybe I'm the faggot America
I'm not a part of a redneck agenda"
-Green Day, "American Idiot"

Wednesday, November 03, 2004

Four more years...

I seem to remember being in this same position in the year 2000 right after the election: convincing all of my liberal friends that "everything will be all right", and taking solace in the joy my Republican friends found in the outcome. Obviously, if I could get along well with people on both sides of the fence, there must not be as vast a difference between the two sides as people seem to think. As I've heard it said, "what unites us is stronger than what divides us."

And so President George W. Bush won a decisive presidential victory, as I have been predicting for a while now (see my blog post from September 3). Today, Senator John Kerry did the right thing by conceding rather than drag it out like in 2000. The race wasn't nearly as close anyway.

Naturally, my day so far has consisted of some friends joking about moving to Canada, and other friends urging them to do so. Now of course, as a self-described rational liberal, I do not believe this widening of the divide is what the country needs. But its happening comes as no shock.

To explain calling myself a "rational liberal": I believe that both parties are dedicated to doing what they think is right for the country, and that both candidates (power-hungry though they may be) actually do want to do right by the American people. As I put it earlier this morning, I give Bush more credit than most Democrats, and I give Kerry more credit than most Republicans. The simple fact is that I place great import in civil rights: Life, Liberty, and the pursuit of Happiness. I long to extend those rights to the world, but first I'd like to extend them to this country.

The irony is that most of my friends, Republicans, conservatives, and liberal alike, agree with those simple rights. The disagreement lies in which rights are most important to provide, and how best to provide them.

So to President Bush (because he will no doubt read this, as what I have to say is infinitely important to him), I make this plea: unite us. Show us that this country can truly be free, and that we can work together for the betterment of the world. Do not use the Republican Congressional majority to push forward a fundamentalist social agenda (drop the FMA, for starters). As you appoint Supreme Court justices, uphold your promise to not use a litmus test. Examine options, ask others' opinions, be sure you know enough facts before rushing into anything.

And maybe get a new Attorney General.

Song lyric of the day:
"Say it's true, it's true
And we can break through
Though torn in two
We can be one..."
-U2, "New Year's Day"